(entry is written in Sabahan language yg rusak2 and campur2)sometimes kalau the Chinese communicate each other using their mother-tongue, then sya diam-diam seja, keep my mouth shut and then tanya dorg kunun apa maksud. Ei.. actually lama suda ba gia nie sya ni kepingin pandai Cina, it's ok and fine if i can't speak or write in Chinese, but at least i understand what they are talking about. Manalah tau kena umpat2 kah, nanti x tau apa maksud, senyum seja kunun... bukan ka bikin malu.. adidi... so, this is not the right time to blame my parents who did not send us (my siblings) to chinese school. Start from my sisters, then me, and finally my only lil brother, semua study di mission school; mula lah dari St. Anthony's Kindergarten, St. Anthony's Primary School and St. Anthony's Secondary School. usually, I feel regret bcz i can't even undertand it, siki-siiiiiiiikkkiiiitt bulih lah faham... tu pun yg budak2 punya... Now, sudah mau tua, it's not that easy mau blajar new language, apa lagi mau cakap Cina. My goodness! one more thing, if i jalan p mana2, either tamu, market, restaurant or everywhere, selalu kunun kena cakap cina. adui, bikin malu baa, last2 i will answer, "sorry auntie/uncle, i'm not a Chinese ooo.." then, they will just laugh and apologize. Pity me kan... i always ask myself, "chinese-look kah sya ni?" mcm tidak bah... hehe... however, whatever it is, i still need someone to teach me Chinese!